To Kill A Mockingbird *6* ~Ch. 16-19~ Perspective: Mayella Ewell

Well, as the morning rays are dispersing, a pang of fear is cloaked upon me. I wonder what exactly I best be testifying to anyways. I was aware of the truth, I felt the truth, but I couldn’t begin to express it. I’ve been lead to point where my heart and mind have even started believing my lies. I have so assuredly convinced myself that this story is reality. But today, the day of the court case, I am not so sure.

We arrive to the town courthouse with minutes to spare. My father looks me in the eyes with a wrath even I was unfamiliar with. We have never one spoken about the case and what exactly was expected of me to say against the defendant. He spoke quietly but sharply, “ To hell with the nigger.” Even to my own justification I knew not why I was supposed to be prejudice and hate the Negroes, but I did. It was just the way things worked. I distinguish Dolphus Raymond sitting with his usual company. It was never difficult for anyone in Maycomb to be aware of his presence. I wasn’t sure if a figure like himself would benefit or demolish our case. Shortly after, we walk through the wooden doorframe into the courtroom. Sheriff Heck Tate is called to the stand.

Time progressed and specifics arose. I always feared the next word spoken. My name echoes the courtroom and my steps do the same. I simply recited my perception of what happened. Periodically, tears poured down my face uncontrollably. The court paused and an uncomfortable aura filtered the room. Maybe they were begrudged to give me this time as they all had their other things to attend to subsequent to this lawsuit. I didn’t understand much of what they were asking of me, but Atticus was doing it the worst. His levels of intimidation could shrink me without exchanging a single glance. It’s like his subtlety stared directly at my soul and knew everything. Like he was just taunting me to reveal the truth. I hated everything that man stood for. Then, salvation came…the hearing hushed to take a break.